Awkward
by Fates My Bitch
Summary: Connor gets an interesting link from a friend which sparks a lot of attention amongest the males of the Fang Gang. Run Andrew, run.


Awkward

I just thought this would be a likely situation between a father and son. Well, at least Angel and Connor. Also, its after season 7 of Buffy and season 5 of Angel (forget the final battle and Angel and Spike are still vamps). So prepare for weirdness, awkwardness, silliness and people trying to kill Andrew.

-------------

Connor swirled in the nice, big, leather chair that Angel had bought him, in front of the nice laptop that Angel also had bought him, in his room that Angel had given him. He was borded. None of his friends were online and he really had no interest in anything besides fighting.

Glancing at the computer screen he say a name pop up on his screen. "WomanLoveTheAndman"

...

"What's Andrew doing on?"

----------  
SonofVamps: Andman? wat u doin up?

WomanLoveTheAndman: dude. just finished it.

SonofVamps: finished wat?

WomanLoveTheAndman: look.

WomanLoveTheAndman: link  
----------

Connor rolled his eyes. Andrew was always sending him links to the stupid movies he made. Most of them had no point and some were even ... inappropriate. Not that he was complaining. A video of girls playing strip poker was one of his favorites.

He clicked it being a bored teenage boy and having nothing better to do. A video popped up and he recognized the song.

_"You and me baby ain't nothing but mammals."_

Two blonds stumbled onto the screen, her hand wrapped around his neck, one of his on her ass and the other buried into her hair.

_"So lets do it like they do on the discovery channel."_

They slammed into the dresser causing it to shake as he hoisted her onto it, hooking her legs around him. Connor felt the blood rush to his face, than move down to a lower area of his body. He looked behind him, checking to see if no one was there. He turned back to his screen and watched as the two blonds threw themselves at each other.

"This... is awesome."

-X-X-X-X-

Angel flipped threw some files when he passed by Connor's room. "Hey Connor." Looking inside the room he saw his son focused intently on his computer. "What are doing?"

Snapping up right he quickly clicked out of the window. "Nothing. I wasn't doing anything."

Angel looked at his son. He took note of the flustered look on his face, the way he sat uncomfortably in his chair, the way he looked nervously from Angel to the computer. "Bring up the window Connor." He used the special dad voice.

Connor gulped and brought it up. He and Angel looked at it for a while. Angel covered his head with his hand trying to hide the start of a nosebleed. "Do... Do you want me to start it from the beginning?" Connor looked at his father.

Angel simply nodded his head. "I'm going to get Gunn and Wes. I think they'll want to see this."

-X-X-X-X-

"What are they doing?" Wes titled his head sideways. "Are they..."

"Going for doggie style. These two really know each other to move from one position to another." Gunn passed the popcorn to Angel who took a handful. "Who'd you get this from again?"

"Andrew. He sends me a buncha stuff like this. Makes it himself." Connor never looked from the screen. "Its not him. He's just really sneaky."

Silence fell over the 3 men and the one teenager, entranced by the couple in front of them. "How long have they been going at it?"

The couple moaned and wrapped around themselves around each other. The man let out a low growl as the girl sunk her teeth into his shoulder. The woman let out a screech of what they weren't sure was pain or pleasure as he slammed her into the stone wall.

"Dunno."

They moved their heads to the left as a group as they became half off half on the bed. Never stopping.

"They must both have incredible stamina."

They made a noncomental grunt in the back of their throats. They were not aware of a blond vampire as he walked into the room. "Hey mates. What are ya' watchin'?" He jerked up an eyebrow at the screen. "Ah. Young Connor has discovered the joys of pornography. So what are we watching? Backdoor sluts 9? Naughty nurses 12?"

"No. Something that Andrew sent me. I'll never make fun of him again."

Spike peered closely at the screen. "This looks familiar." He peered in closer. That's when it him like a thousand games of Buffy's favorite game (Lets Kick the Spike). "Oh that little fucker!"

He grabbed the back of the back of the chair and pushed Connor out of the way. "Hey! I was watching that!"

"Well you're not anymore!" Spike logged into the web site grimly happy to find Andrew still on.

----------  
TheBlondKiller: ANDREW YOU LITTLE F***ER!! YOU JUST WAIT UNTIL I GET MY HANDS ON YOU!!

WomanLoveTheAndman: oh crap!!

[WomanLoveTheAndman has logged off]  
----------

He clicked the porn out much to the despair of all his fellow males. "Angel, I need a ticket to Rome. I have to beat that little fucker's head in!"

"Why? And I'm sure he's going to be barricaded in his room for a month from that message alone."

"I don't care!" Spike shouted. "How dare he invade our -!" Spike got an evil gleam in his eyes. "Maybe I'll just tell Buffy. She'll probably hurt him more than I could."

Gunn glanced at Wes and Angel than at Spike. "What are you talking about?"

The look clearly said 'Are you stupid?'. "Um. That was my crypt."

Angel was the first one to make the connection. "Oh God! Just - NO!!" And stormed out the room, cursing and stuttering over them as he went and he was so thrown he even reverted to his old accent.

Gunn clapped Spike on the shoulder. "Man you have got to tell me some of those stories. Who knew sex with a slayer was so violent."

Wes just walked away, hoping that someday the realization of what he had just seen would fade from his mind. But, he thought of Fred and maybe he should try some of Spike's moves.

Angel shoved a ticket into his Spike's hands and stalked back out of the room, not saying a word. Spike, feeling high and mighty, but still pissed as hell, left with a swish of his duster out to beat some poor nerds head in. Maybe he could call Buffy, have her join him. And afterwards maybe have a nice long shag. He smiled at the thought of the long delayed reunion. He let out an evil giggle as he chose a car out of Angel's garage and driving to the airport. "I'm coming to see you pet."

And Connor was left alone. With a computer. And a link to a very hot porn. And he did what any boy his age would have done. He turned it back on.

--------------fin--------------

Don't worry. Andrew wasn't killed. He was just horrible beaten by a pmsing slayer while a vampire that videotaped it. It sold more than his porn.


End file.
